Even in the Christian church, “love” has been abused, and even the very opposite of it has been taught and practiced. That, to me, seems to be the very definition of spiritual insanity.
I think we need to realize that love cannot be divorced from doing right and good things.
Many people in families make a point of telling others the words, “I love you.” But, by doing this, are they really growing in an intuition, an understanding, a feeling, and a practice of the thing itself?
Also, being frustrated by the two items above, I endeavored to define, for myself, in words, what love is. I almost gave up, having read many writers declare that it was impossible to define. But, not being content to leave it a mystery, I finally found something in the words of C.S. Lewis that is really the same as what David Cain said in his most recent raptitude.com post and I think also what the Bible says, and what my experience confirms. So, I feel very confident about it: love is seeking the other person’s (or your own) highest good, so far as it can be obtained.
Notice here that this definition does not leave love open merely to being a mystery, or just a feeling, or a selfish thing. It also doesn’t leave “love” open to being whatever you merely -think- it best for someone, but what actually -is-, objectively, the ultimate good for the other person, especially regardless of your own feelings, ideas, biases, or self-concerns.
This is a high idea of a lofty and yet very practical thing: love.